I'm going to get a little more personal with this one. Although Tommy's birth was the best thing to happen to my husband and I, it also put us through one of the toughest experiences we've ever gone through. Not many people know everything that occurred during that very important time in our lives, including family. Well, after requests of our birth experience, I'm finally able to share it with you all (although I may shed a few tears as I relive it). So.....grab your tissues, here we go!
***This may contain information that some would consider TMI. If that's you, stop reading now***
Wednesday April, 24th 2013
At a VERY pregnant 9 months, only 6 days away from my due date, Tom & I went in for our last doctor's appointment (at the time we didn't know it'd be our last). After the normal check in - blood pressure, weight (my favorite, ugh), etc. - we finally sat with my doctor. She checked me (you know, the fun part where they shove their fingers inside to feel if you're dialating and thinning out), and said I was one centimeter dialated. At this same appointment, my doctor said Tommy was "engaged" but she didn't think that when the time came, he would fit (for those that haven't had a baby before, this means his head was too large to fit through my pelvis). This was the first time a C-section was mentioned. I immediately broke down in her office. I never even thought about the possibility of a c-section. My mom and sister both had their children naturally, why couldn't I? I was more scared than anything. Although I knew Tom would be by my side the whole time, a C-section is
MAJOR surgery. I've never even had minor surgery & now I have to have my stomach cut open? I was terrified. My doctor was very comforting (as was Tom) and suggested we give the baby until Sunday to see if things changed. This confused me because at my appointment the week prior, my doctor told me that if Tommy hadn't come by this appointment, she'd induce me the next day (4/25). We had family coming into town with the understanding I'd be induced on Thursday, not Sunday. Also, if she didn't think he'd fit now, what made her think he'd fit on Sunday? Isn't he just going to continue to grow, or will his head shrink? Will my pelvis widen even more between now and Sunday? These were some of the questions running through my head. I kindly reminded her that she originally said she'd induce me on the 25th if the baby hadn't come by then. I know, it's better to leave baby baking for as long as possible but by this point, I was just soooo ready to have him & didn't want to wait until Sunday. Plus, not to sound like a total selfish bitch, we had family coming for Thursday, not Sunday. What would we tell them? Thank you for flying in and driving 3 hours to be here but I'm not being induced until Sunday, the day AFTER you fly back home.
At this point, my doctor left the decision up to Tom and I. She did state that if we decided on tomorrow and he didn't arrive by noon, she would go ahead with a C-section. After weighing out the pros and cons of waiting until Sunday or inducing tomorrow, we decided to go with the induction the following day. Although still terrified (scared of ripping my vagina open during delivery & scared to be cut open - are there any other ways to deliver a baby without pain?), I was ready to meet my baby. I was also SO ready to be back to normal. Don't get me wrong, I LOVED being pregnant. This was one time in my life where I actually felt pretty. I was wanting the feeling of being uncomfortable to be over. Around 7 1/2 months pregnant, I started suffering from sciatica. Sciatica is pain affecting the back, hip, and outer side of the leg, caused by compression of a spinal nerve root in the lower back, often owing to degeneration of an intervertebral disk (full definition for you right there). In other words, the baby was positioned on my sciatic nerve making every movement uncomfortable/painful. Needless to say, I was DONE!!
We told our doctor that we just wanted to be induced tomorrow since that was the original plan. She immediately got on the phone to call the Women's Center where I'd deliver to schedule my appointment. While she was doing this, I was running through my head what we should do in the last 24 hours before I get induced. Then I hear "tonight"......TONIGHT?? I thought I was being induced tomorrow? Although that's only one day different, that means I only have a few hours, not 24. Reality definitely sat in at that moment. I'll be meeting our little boy tomorrow.....ahhhhh!!!!
We left the clinic & headed to Chipotle for my "final meal" (we all know once you're in labor, you can't eat). That decision I somewhat regretted later on if you know what I mean, lol. Tom & I finished up some last minute errands (he was now officially on paternity leave) & went home to get our bags together. The doctor had scheduled me to be induced at 10pm and being that we lived about 30 minutes from the birthing center, we figured we'd leave at 915pm to ensure we'd arrive on time. HA...that didn't happen. We didn't leave our house until 945pm and I was freaking out that'd we'd be late. Well, this was a blessing in disguise and the first sign that God was with us during this time. As we were leaving our house, I could hear sirens in the distance. We jumped on the main road from our house that leads us to the highway and I could see in the far distance an ambulance driving onto the highway with its lights activated. A few minutes later we merged onto the highway only to be in the middle of traffic, bad traffic. We were at a standstill and I began to really freak out that we'd be late. After sitting in the same spot for what felt like eternity, we saw a Flight for Life helicopter landing in the middle of the highway. It was landing at an extremely bad accident (which we verified shortly after the helicopter took off again and we began moving). I remember thinking to myself how lucky we were for running late. If we would have left on time, that could have been us. I continued to tell myself that God was with us that night.
When we finally made it to the hospital, Tom's mom and brother were there to greet us. We waited a short amount of time before being escorted to my birthing suite. After getting settled in, the nurses evaluated the baby on the monitors before inserting Cervidil (a tampon-like object inserted inside with a medicine to help soften your cervix and initiate contractions). Once inserted, I was not allowed to move for the first two hours, although it needed to stay inside for 10 hours. After two hours, I was now able to move around freely in my room. Although still inside, I no longer had to stay in the annoying hospital bed. THIS was the moment where I regretted eating the Chipotle for lunch. I've always heard about women pooping during delivery so I was glad this feeling overtook me now and not later.
Thursday April 25, 2013
Not quite 10 hours after the Cervidil was inserted, around 9am, the nurses removed it and my doctor came in to check me. At this time, my doctor broke my water and the fun began. All I have to say about that, OUCH!! I'd later learn that this was more painful than getting my epidural. While doing all this and "checking" me, my doctor again said that I was warm (eventually I learned this meant I had an infection). She said I had a few hours to go (remember that noon deadline?) and that I was still at 1 centimeter. At this time I was also issued Pitocin to kick-start my labor. Well, kick-start it did. Shortly after all of this, I began feeling contractions. My doctor said it'd be pointless to wait for an epidural and I could just have it issued now since the drugs are on a "as need basis", thank goodness.
Finally, the anesthesiologist came in to administer me my drugs. I was so upset when they told me that Tom was not allowed to be in the room with me while I got the epidural. I begged and pleaded and they continued to tell me no. Their reasoning - most dads/partners "pass out".
WHO CARES!!! He's my husband and I need him there for me. It didn't matter how much I wanted it, the answer remained. UGH!! I was extremely nervous since 1. they're placing a needle into my spine and 2. my husband wasn't there to comfort me. After it was all said and done, I was so thankful for getting the goods. I was in a happy place and they gave me the "remote control" for more drugs if I needed it. A few hours passed and my doctor came in again. It was now NOON....the time she said they'd do the C-section if my baby wasn't here yet. Well, instead of completing it now, she decided to wait "a few more hours" to see if things progressed any further.
Tom, his mom and brother all left to go get lunch at this point so that I could get some rest. I remember them walking into my room with a HUGE pizza to check on me before going to the waiting area to eat, so as not to "rub it in my face" that I wasn't allowed to eat anything. What the heck....walking into a pregnant girl's room with pizza, torture! I just remember how good it smelled and how jealous I was. A few hours passed again and I remember I began feeling my contractions coming on SUPER strong. I grabbed my remote control and
attempted to administer myself more drugs. Nothing! I waited a few more minutes just in case I didn't let the drugs set in before pushing the button again. NOTHING!! What in the name of hades is going on? I thought this was supposed to be a self administered remote control. My husband went to get a nurse to find out why it wasn't working and she told us............they unplugged it (yes, intentionally)!!! SERIOUSLY??? Why would you unplug my remote to comfort. Once everything was plugged back in and I pushed my button, I was back on cloud 9....thank goodness!
At about 615pm, my doctor came in to check me again. Immediately afterwards, the phrase came out of her mouth I'd never forget: "Do you want your family in here for this conversation?" My heart immediately sank because I knew what this meant, C-section. After going over the reasoning for having to go through with the C-section and another mini-breakdown, Tom and I were ready. This was it....we were finally going to meet our precious baby. After getting me prepped, they finally wheeled me down the hallway into the operating room. I was so thankful I had my husband by my side.
Tom wasn't allowed to go into the operating room until after they had me set up. Apparently this took about 20-30 minutes, but for me it seemed pretty quick. I remember hearing beeping and the voices of several nurses and my doctor before Tom sat down next to me. Finally....it was time. The moment we'd been waiting for for 39 weeks. All of a sudden, at 710pm, I heard a gasp and then a soft cry. He was here! My baby was in this world and I was so overjoyed. Tom got up to follow baby Tommy while they cleaned him up, weighed him and measured him. I remember thinking to myself that something was wrong. Why wasn't he screaming like in the movies? Why did everyone seem panicky? I kept asking "Is he ok? Is he ok? What's wrong? Why isn't he crying? Is he ok?" The only person to answer my desperate questions was the anesthesiologist who was standing by my head. I remember him saying, "He's fine. He's ok. They're working on him." This answer didn't calm me. I remember feeling so helpless. I knew something wasn't right because they didn't hold him over the drapes for me to get a glimpse of my new bundle. I still hadn't seen him. SOMEBODY TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY SON!!! Then finally, a nurse brought him beside me and I got my first look. He was PERFECT! Amazing and beautiful! Thank GOD that he is here. The nurse told me to give him a kiss so they could take him to the nursery.
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Love at first sight!
It took awhile for the doctor and nurses to finish my C-section. They don't just pull the baby out and stitch you up right away. There's a lot of cleaning and rearranging my organs back to their positions (yes, this is true). At one point I could feel my leg slipping from the table. I later learned that it actually fell OFF the table (I'll talk about that in Part 2). There was a point where I remember saying over and over, "Ouch, it hurts". The anesthesiologist asked me twice "does it hurt or is it the tugging/pulling you feel." I told him I didn't know and next thing I knew, he was inserting a needle into the IV and I immediately felt as if I was, what I can describe as, walking on clouds.
After everything was all said and done, I was finally wheeled out of the operating room and into this mini hallway type room. I waited here for what seemed like for-ever. I could see a nurse out of the corner of my eye working on paperwork and walking back and forth. All I continued to do was beg her for pain medication. After probably being annoyed by my long "puhleeeeese, I neeeeed something for the paaaiiiiiin." groaning, she finally told me that I have everything and anything they could have possibly given me. Not long after, Tom walked in. I was so happy to see him and my pain immediately went away. I asked where Tommy was and how he was doing and Tom said he was in the nursery getting checked out. After waiting, yet again, they
FINALLY wheeled Tommy in. They asked if I wanted to hold him and, without hesitation, I said YES!! Here he was, my son. In my arms for the first time. It was the best feeling in the world. He was sleeping and I didn't want to give him up for anything.
Eventually, they wheeled me into my recovery room. This is where Tom's mom and brother got to meet Tommy for the first time. After Tom got to hold him for a short time, his mom and brother also got to hold him. It was so great to see how much this little boy had changed our family in such a short amount of time. It was no longer just husband and wife. We were now a family!
Tommy was handed back to me so that I could nurse him. He was a champ. He wasted no time in latching on; however, he wasn't eating anything (we didn't realize this until later on). While I was holding him, my husband and I noticed his breathing didn't sound normal. We told a nurse who said, "Oh, you know. Sometimes babies just sing after they're born", referring to the breathing sounds he was making. She said she'd get a second nurse to look at him, just in case. Thank God she did. They took baby Tommy out of my arms and wheeled him to the nursery so that they could observe him for awhile. By now it was so late, we decided to get some rest and Tom's mom and brother left for the night. The doctor who was watching over Tommy came in super late that night and told us that his breathing isn't getting any better and that they were going to keep him in the nursery for the night. This moment was the beginning to what I'd consider the
worst toughest 2 weeks of my life!!
...to be continued!
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